Arnaud was Suncat's roommate in the Jayhawker Towers at the University of Kansas. He is best remembered for storing pizza under his bed (apperantly no refrigerators in France) and riding his bright-ass yellow bike around campus.
Brune: A free spirit, like the wind, Brune is a real person who traveled and partied with Suncat and Tumnus. As a free spirit, Brune is one of those people who reject the theory that "the Man"
has any legitimate authority to restrict the flow of herb, namely, marijuana. Brune will best be remembered for bong sessions which turned to orgies at the drop of a hat. He once had some ex-convict at his house who was telling prison stories about guys fucking livers in the prison kitchen and some shit about sitting on his hand until it fell asleep and then beating off with it. This guy was a total freak, he was never allowed back in Brune's house - even stoners have standards.
The nun statue which is situated atop the Convent in Great Bend, KS...right across from the Hospital. This statue becomes animated when provoked, and flies through the air like a heat-seeking missile, looking for prey. DOS is a creature unlike any other. He is a golden labrador retriever who has a terrible flatulence problem, and likes to have people notice his bowel movements. DOS can frequently be found in Suncat's home, making a mess, and making Suncat angry. A prime candidate for animal abuse, DOS is lucky Suncat is so forgiving. Professor of atmospheric science at the University of Kansas. He is quite old, and tall, and can be seen carting his "multimedia presentation" equipment through the halls. He writes his own textbooks, and makes you buy them. All the information within them is outdated...and he used graphs which stop at 1979. AKA.."Star Hustler"...he comes on PBS at various times to tell you all about the constellations and such. We like how he gets around...riding a "silver-surferlike" platform through space. His program features some exhilerrating theme music...sort of like cascading whistles. Kittywampus, in the pampas, half past one. He was invented by Mr. Tumnus circa 1988...initially a large splatterpainted paper mache head made for Mr. Dinkels art class. Kitty first made his debut in comic strip stories... and has now moved up in the world, starring in "Story Hour." Kitty defies physics with his giant oversized light bulb shaped head... and keeps thin by constantly being on the go. He is more prepared than an eagle scout... always having what he needs at all times. He is a true friend to all. Laura Arnold is a fat retarded girl from GBHS. She is short and stout...has a butch haircut, and drools constantly. When on the go, she resembles one of those "bobble head" dolls. Beware of her presence when eating your lunch...you may lose your appetite...unless it is "crunchy munchy chili day." Mike "Your friend" Stifter as he is called by Tumnus, was an employer of Suncat and manager of the first and only apartment complex to ever contain the duo at the same time. Although not actually a friend of Suncat, he is referred to as if he were. Mr. Tumnus is our friend, he has rules, but they will bend. Hello, I'm Mr. Tumnus... and I'm a Pan. I can see you from atop Mt. Washington... so beware. I have hooves, a beard, and horns... and my song is this... "Mr. Tumnus is our friend, he has rules that they will bend"... sing it, or you will surely die. Popeye runs a junkyard in Chase, KS, but what may look like an ordinary junkyard is soon known to be a clever facade when you stumble onto the illegal kennels and open sewer into which his broken septic tank has become. Long ago, when it first broke, it flooded, making an impressive lagoon of feces, into which flew many ducks These ducks had feathers which were quickly damaged by the contents of the pond, rendering them flightless. They stumbled upon the kennel food supply, and grew into huge, flightless ducks which wade in the sewage pond, where no one can flush them out. Ron Manneth is a habitual sex offender in the city of Great Bend, KS. It would be slanderous to say this about someone if it were not true, so we will not slander here. Ron rides a bright red moped and tries to pick up little boys. He has a bald head, stupid look on his face at all times, and does NOT like to be followed around by a big car with two guys inside wearing masks - you can take that from Suncat and Tumnus! As mystical as it is random, the Skinless dingo comes, howls, and leaves, never to be seen again... until next time The evil offspring of an evil sire. SOT started out innocent enough, a little boy modeling some PLAY! PLAY! PLAY! green overalls in a JC Penny's catalog (winter '96 I think). He has now taken off with a life of his own as he works non-stop on science projects and physics defying activities. You may think you are safe, but SOT is always watching and has been known to swoop out of the very sky and fall upon hapless would-be evildoers. Take heed, SOT is not to be crossed, for he is a vengeful child and he delights in imposing his will. A gentleman, and a scholar. Suncat formed a bond with Tumnus early in adolescence by raising hell in school. Tumnus was (and is) without exception, the craziest person Suncat has ever encountered in his globetrotting life. In his spare time, Suncat invents things like teleportation nexuses, weapons of mass destruction, mechanical animals (see Turbo Timmy), and can be recognized by his uncanny ability to make something out of nothing, as if just feeling like doing something whips matter into existence.
Stone Cold Steve Austin (SCSA): SCSA has the honor of being our favorite Pro Wrestler. Not because we like the sport, but just because it is so damn funny that so many people do. I will admit, I have watched WWF before, and I like his attitude toward authority, but not enough to actually watch it again. The ultimate Fighter for the Ultimate Stories ever told! None other than Tudor Hampton, Resident Assistant (RA) for McCollom Hall at the University of Kansas. This guy is something else. When Suncat went to KU to visit Tumnus, Tudor bought hot wings for everyone. When Tumnus took a plateful (what else are you going to do?) Tudor pointed out how much he took and said, "Hey guys, come on, save some for everyone else!" This plea ensured Tudor a place in the story archive for as long as Geocities is free.
TurboTimmy, the Mechanimal (TT): A creature or a machine? Many who have seen Timmy, or its replacement TurboTimmy have pondered that great topic. A machine could not be as agile, an animal could not be electronic and combustion powered. Regardless, TT is a wonder to behold as it forms from the merging of a 1979 Pontiac Trans Am and a 1979 Ford Fairmont. It is catlike in it's grace and cruel as the blackest of hates, yet it performs as good as could be expected from a balanced, blueprinted, well oiled, and finely tuned machine.
Nemesis to the great duo of the new mellennia - Tumnus and Suncat. The legend of VB was spawned in 1997 after seeing one of the first episodes of South Park. The elevators of C tower in the Jayhawker Towers apartment complex were always shaking, especially if some one (hypthetically speaking) were to get out of the elevator, act like they were walking away, then turn to slam the doors shut while an unsuspecting and unseeing occupant was inside. You then turned and ran like hell so they couldnt get a good description of you and call the front office to say who was jacking around with the elevators. They shook like hell and scared the people inside, the shaking was then blamed on VB, an evil resident of the elevator shaft who lived in an intricate labyrinth of catacombs on top of which the Jayhawker Towers were built. Tumnus and Suncat "fed" and gave sacrifices to appease VB by throwing trash in the elevator shaft after getting fined for throwing trash out their apartment windows. Among VB's favorite offerings were an electric blue blanket stolen from Brune at a concert, jean shorts, pot seeds, a gallon of milk Tumnus found, pizza boxes, grease drained from cooked meat, Pitch Weeklies, junk mail, and a package for Paul Pierce (then a KU Jayhawk, later a Boston Celtic). They say you can still hear VB to this day...
Workers at the "Great Bend Packing" Plant (Paula, Andrea, Kelly):
Beeker, the Swedish Chef, and other Muppets (Including Sesame Street):
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